


505

by ruruie



Category: Cyberpunk 2077 (Video Game)
Genre: Bastard Johnny Silverhand, Drug Abuse, Drug Use, Enemies to Lovers, Established Relationship, F/M, Hate Sex, I'll just tag what I know will happen, Johnny's in the worst years of his life, Recreational Drug Use, Simulation AU, This is weird, V is a mess, V's in a simulation trapped there with him, ah shit here we go again, alt is hot, and there's not a lot of like overt angst, but no one is having a good time, everyone is a mess, have fun, i'm a mess, in terms of engram Johnny and V, in terms of simulation Johnny and V, johnny is a little bastard with a big dick, like it gets soft, no one remembers her but they kinda do, rogue is hot, santiago can fuck, there's that
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-12
Updated: 2021-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-18 23:29:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 15,454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29990484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ruruie/pseuds/ruruie
Summary: Posters on the wall said that Johnny and Kerry were performing as a double ticket, the date given being March 30th, 2013. This placed her right before Alt’s death, his downward spiral already underway. Issues with Kerry, lost glory days of Samurai, drug abuse, and not to mention he and Alt were on the rocks so bad they’d be done in about fifteen days and she’d be dead right after they ended it. Johnny told her once that this was the nightmare he had that plagued him, the one that made him sweat, never forgetting a single detail. Including the month leading up to it. Fuck. Of course they landed right in the middle of this, why wouldn’t they? Couldn’t have been back in 2004 when he was living his best life. Nope. Had to be now.
Relationships: Johnny Silverhand/Female V, Johnny Silverhand/V
Comments: 46
Kudos: 74





	1. Every Morning

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ravenstrange](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ravenstrange/gifts), [Beammeupbroadway](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beammeupbroadway/gifts).



> So, a little note. I've been working on this thing (known as the "Bastard Fic") since maybe late January/early February. It's completely outlined, some of it written, and I just kind of adore it. I'm putting it out here because I love it, my friends love it, and frankly it's just the most insane thing I've written in terms of just. Shit happening. I'm not even sure what to tag it as, given that it's so off the wall in terms of exactly what's happening. 
> 
> And, I'll be updating this and "Do You Dream of Me?" and one more fic I have planned every other day. That way I'm not working on the same project day in and day out because I think that might have been what was causing me to experience some minor burn out. 
> 
> Anyway!!! Hope to those reading you enjoy <3

“When I was in here the first time, we had to pull a memory from you. Somethin’ with Alt, right? You got one in mind?” The vast void of the Net was around them, and Johnny somehow managed to find the one chair to sit on, backwards of course, never sitting on anything in its proper way. Talking to Alt was the final step in getting something solid to bring to Rogue, and when V plugged in from her own home setup there was no Alt there to greet them. They’d been down this road before, though, and if the Voodoo Boys couldn’t automatically get Alt to come out, she didn’t think she could either. 

“You even know how that was done? How to try and jump into one of my memories?”

V snorted, hand on her cocked hip as she looked down at him. “That’s your concern here? Not ‘hey V, might be thinkin’ this data fortress ain’t too secure’ or ‘don’t you think you’re gonna get your gonk brain fried’?” Was her Silverhand impression good? In terms of voice pitch and accent, no. But, she could pick out his exact words like they were her own.

“Nah, see I’m used to dealin’ with crazy chicks,'' tapping the side of his temple then pointing to V, he wore that typical, wicked smirk, “they think of all the ways to get somewhere, but never what to do when they actually arrive at the destination. ‘Sides, you’re no seasoned Netrunner, but you’re not green. And you’ve got Judy standin’ watch. Dunno what some whore lovin’ Mox is gonna do if – when – things go wrong, but at least she can try. So, tell me. How you plan on doin’ this?”

Rolling her eyes, V just ignored the first bit, knowing well he was partly correct and partly being a huge dick as always. “Brigitte didn’t really say much in the way of givin’ me instructions on how she conjured up the memories, but I remember the feelin’, if that makes sense. Some kinda bridge from me to Alt, using your memories and the Deep Net to connect us all. Said I was somethin’ special, and she’s not wrong. Not many people could get us this far.”

“Ha! You sure ‘bout that? Tellin’ you, losin’ yourself pretty damn quick if you’re thinkin’ you’re somethin’ more than some loser that got dragged outta the landfill. But, sure, you keep tellin’ yourself that.”

“Fuck off, asshole. Anyway, she enhanced the connection between us, but that was back before we were so...” V waved her hand in front of her, gesturing vaguely, not quite sure what words to use to describe what they were now. “Us? Together? Uhhh...”

“’Fore I ripped out the parta you that makes you separate from me.” He seemed sad about that fact, even if V reaffirmed that there wasn’t much in the way he could do to prevent that. That she was the one letting it happen, just in case things didn’t work out the way they hoped. Closure for the dead, and some reassurance for the living.

“Either way, we’re more connected now. She grabbed my head. Did somethin’ to me to make me feel a strong memory – one associated directly with Alt. Like searching a database of keywords. So, I’ll ask again. Got one in mind?”

Johnny rose from the chair, walking over to V, arms crossed over his chest. “Maybe. Be honest with ya, it was probably my strongest memory of Alt, anyway. Already lived it. Think another strong memory might do, even if it ain’t about her?”

Thinking on it, there wasn’t much to say it wouldn’t. But, V wanted to be safe, be sure they actually contacted Alt. “Maybe? The whole reason was to convince Alt that it was the real you on the chip, but if you recall anything she wasn’t directly involved with it might prove a little difficult. Anyone can produce a Silverhand memory – your whole life was one performance after another. Shit, if I wanted I could just look up all the information I needed to craft an entire story based on you set after the events of 2013 and Alt would be none the wiser. Gotta be one of her, okay?”

Foot tapping the floor of the Net, eyes looking anywhere but at her, Johnny was clearly thinking of something, anything, with Alt. “Alright. Take ya back to when he first met. Just gimme a minute to try and remember it. How it all began.”

“Sure, alright. Take some time, but not too much, don’t wanna hang in that tub longer than I have to.” Pacing around Johnny as he sorted through all his memories, V felt a tingle behind her ear. Reaching back, she touched the port that the Relic sat in, the feeling radiating from there. The Net made everything feel so different, so strange, and she didn’t recognize the telltale signs of a malfunction until it was too late, everything in the Net glitching out, her whole body alight with the sensation of needles poking holes through every nerve. Legs giving out, constructed body seizing, she started to fall. Clinging to what she could, she called out, a habit now that the Relic was corroding more and more of her brain. “J-Johnny!” 

“V!” Johnny’s hands grabbed her head before it hit whatever was constructed as a floor, and the moment his hands touched her the entire world spun. “V! Get it together!” Words that reached her, but she was already in a trance, her mind searching through Johnny’s memories as it had before, transporting her back in time, Johnny’s words triggering the whole sequence. Wherever she woke up, she at least hoped it would be enough to call out the real Alt.

Dazed, drawn out of her own mind, V saw the blue and red of the Net fading into the reality of whatever version of Night City Johnny created. On the street, she was outside of a club, and she figured that this was where Johnny would be playing a show, no other reason she saw to even be outside of one. It was routine at this point, any time she slipped into a memory, just waiting for things to start making sense - move on their own. Reaching in the pocket of the pants she was in, she expected to find a pack of cigarettes, knowing if Johnny was outside, he was outside to smoke. Not finding what she was looking for, she just sucked her teeth, because of course that gonk would forget his own cigarettes. Going through what seemed like a Johnny motion, she tapped a guy on the shoulder as he passed by. “Got a cig I can bum?”

Something wasn’t right. That wasn’t Johnny’s voice that spoke. It wasn’t Johnny’s hand that tapped the guy’s shoulder. She was shorter than this guy, who she knew was average height. As he handed her the cigarette, she thanked him, looking around to take it all in. Her body was her own, typical outfit and everything, tags from Johnny hooked around one of the belt loops of her shorts, fingers adorned with long nails and rings so very different from Johnny’s. However this happened, whether it be the Relic or some mistake on either one of their parts when jacking into the Net, V was stuck somewhere that wasn’t her version of Night City.

Trying to find clues, she couldn’t exactly place where she was in the city, but the cars and tech looked older. It had to be somewhere in Johnny’s timeline, but why she was able to move around freely she didn’t quite grasp. When living out Johnny’s memories the events and their order were already set, everything exactly how it happened, or close to it. She wasn’t given free range of things, minus being the one who willed the actions on, but the world would move on as it did, nothing changed in the present. There wasn’t the sense that things would work out better or different, just that they would happen. A rail shooter, where the only thing that was different each time was the score at the end.

Now? She could walk down the street as V, not Johnny. Evident by the cigarette in her hand, people saw her, could talk to her. Touch her. Respond appropriately to requests.

It wasn’t out the realm of possibility that somehow their little fuck up caused time travel, but she highly doubted it. If one could do that most corps would already be altering the past. Though, the more she thought about it, the more she realized that was a possibility, but that no one knew due to the butterfly effect, and she was one of the lucky ones unaffected. So this had the potential to fuck up everything in the future if she took one more step.

However, the more likely answer is that somehow she and Johnny were put into a simulation of an older Night City, built entirely from his memories. How deep could a simulation go, who could say, but this is a woman and her construct that was helping this along, so whatever simulation this was certainly could be something realistic enough.

The other possibility is that she was Johnny, just her brain superimposed her own image over his, the Relic not processing the data entirely correct. One way to find anything out, whether this was time travel, a simulation, or a fuck up, was to stroll into that club and find out what the fuck was going on. Moving forward, she pushed open the doors, early enough in the evening for the place to be sparsely populated, but enough so that she didn’t immediately draw attention. Leaning over the bar, V cleared her throat, grabbing the attention of the bartender.

“Hey, choomba. Humor me for a minute, will ya?” The man just nodded, not really batting an eye at her. Bad sign. Most people when they saw Johnny had some kind of reaction, be it adoration or anger. “Lemme ask you, how uh...How’s my hair look?”

“Fuckin’ shoot me,” dramatic eye roll, glass he was drying slammed down, and V had a finger shoved in her face, “Look, bitch, I know there’s a Silverhand performance later tonight, but I’m not gonna tell you whether or not he’d fuck you. Don’t matter how much merch you got, sweetheart, you’re ugly as sin. So ghost or else I’ll have someone throw you out.” Answers a lot of her questions, including that she was correct in assuming he was playing a show. Apologizing for her abrupt request, she pushed off the bar, looking around, trying to find some clues as to what time period this was. 

Posters on the wall said that Johnny and Kerry were performing as a double ticket, the date given being March 30th, 2013. This placed her right before Alt’s death, his downward spiral already underway. Issues with Kerry, lost glory days of Samurai, drug abuse, and not to mention he and Alt were on the rocks so bad they’d be done in about fifteen days and she’d be dead right after they ended it. Johnny told her once that this was the nightmare he had that plagued him, the one that made him sweat, never forgetting a single detail. Including the month leading up to it. Fuck. Of course they landed right in the middle of this, why wouldn’t they? Couldn’t have been back in 2004 when he was living his best life. Nope. Had to be now.

Two heads were better than one, and if she thought hard enough she might try and find where he was stored away. Likely guess, he would be backstage, waiting for the whole show to begin. 2013 Johnny couldn’t be trusted to show up on time, and if Kerry was involved Johnny was likely here hours early. Meaning that if this simulation had rules, and it surely did, Johnny would likely appear in his own body. Sneaking into the back of the bar, skilled at finding ways through even the tightest security (which this dive did not have). Each door was labeled, and the one that said “Johnny Silverhand” was in plain view in front of her. Pushing the door open, she found him, sitting there on the couch with his head rested on the back, eyes closed. Target acquired, V sighed in relief, knowing she wouldn’t be alone. 

“Johnny! Fuck! What is going on? Somethin’ went seriously fucky in the Net, and now we’re stuck in -”

“I’m sorry, who the fuck are you?”

Brows knitted, V took a closer look at Johnny. The simulation made him look younger, like he really was the Johnny from this time period, likely meaning V didn’t look exactly like V either. She was familiar enough with this version of him, having seen it through his memories, less weathered yet more worn down. It wasn’t likely that Johnny ever saw a younger V, if that was even her form. 

“You jokin’? It’s V...ya know. V.” Hand waving over her body, his face just scrunched up, then relaxed, shrugging his shoulders. “Chick whose brain you live inside of? Closest to you by a long shot - your words, not mine by the way. Tell me you love me each night ‘fore we go to bed.” He just laughed at her, loud, booming, and cold. 

“Oh you’re fuckin’ whacked. Spin around.” Swirling his finger in front of him, he had that shit eating grin on his face, and V was starting to suspect something was off. But, she did as she was told, maybe Johnny’s way of trying to see if she was the real V. Dressed in shorts, he could see the ink on the back of her legs as well as a scar she obtained during their search for a cure for her little Relic problem. All things that could identify her.

“Shit, don’t normally stick my dick in crazy, but fuck it. You’re exactly my type. Nice ass, nova tits, even dressed like a preem joytoy. Likin’ the Samurai tank - not a bad look. Ain’t got nothin’ to lose here. Just lemme get prepped,” quick as the words left his mouth, V saw him lean forward, pouring the contents of a little baggy on the side of his hand, bringing it to his nose and snorting. Pit forming in her stomach, V let out a shaky breath, things becoming more and more dicey by the second. 

“Uh, not here to sleep with you, dickwipe. Definitely not here, not now. You gonna clear that gonk brain of yours and talk to me normally or what? ‘Cause I’m not here to play games. Somethin’ went wrong, and we need to leave this timeline like now.” Closer he got to her, the more she felt afraid, unsure of what he was thinking. Boxing her in against the wall with his arms, face close to her, she tried her hardest to keep a straight face, not show that she was absolutely terrified of this version of Johnny. 

“Fuck you really are whacked. This fuck better be worth it, ‘cause I need to let a little steam off ‘fore the show. Shit, tail good enough and I’ll let you hang back here ‘til I’m done performin’ for another round.” Oh fuck. She needed to remind him. Jog his memory somehow, because fuck she wasn’t liking this.

Grabbing his face between her hands, V spoke loud and clear. “I’m not here to fuck you! It’s not happenin’! Johnny! Are you serious, you don’t know who I am?” 

Snarled lips and heavy breathing, metal hand digging into the wall behind her while the other grabbed her hair, pulling it, he was pissed and she was the thorn in his side. “Am I supposed to, bitch!? No one just sneaks back here to talk. Either we’re fuckin’ or you’re outta here.” 

Something, anything, V needed to find a reminder that might get him to remember her - convince this Johnny she was the real V like they had to do with Alt. Removing her hands from his face, she undid the tags on her belt loop, holding them up for him to see. “Pistis Sophia! You brought me to the Pistis Sophia after I seized up in the parking lot of a motel! Asked me to take these tags as proof of your promise to exchange your life for mine! Asked me if I would take a bullet for you! That ring any bells, Johnny!?” Frantic, her voice cracked as she yelled in his face, his own becoming further enraged, body shaking as he looked at the tags. 

Hand still in her hair, he slammed her head against the wall, trying to wrestle the tags from her grip. “Know too fuckin’ much! Who the fuck you work for!? Start talkin’!” Head still slammed into the wall, V had been here before, violence begetting violence each time they met. “I’ll fuckin’ kill you! Break your fuckin’ fingers!” A threat he might actually follow through on, his grip so much stronger than hers, V holding onto those tags for dear life as his fingers tried to pry them from her. 

“I don’t work for anyone! Jesus fuckin’ Christ man! I’m not an agent! I’m V!” Kneeing him in the balls, he let go of her hair and hand, giving V time to stash the tags in her back pocket before he was up again, likely not feeling the impact for very long. Grip on her shoulders, he threw her onto the table in the middle of the room, bottles devoid of alcohol and injectable drugs falling to the floor as she landed. Leg connecting with his stomach, she got him to the ground, pinning him there for a minute. “Listen to me! Somethin’ went wrong and I need you to fuckin’ remember who I am so that we can contact Alt and delta the fuck outta here!” 

Wrong move. V could see his whole face change into that of a man possessed, throwing her to the ground next to him, punching her face in the same way he punched that slimeball reporter he’d be contacting in a month’s time. If this simulation didn’t make V look like V, Johnny’s blows certainly weren’t going to help. Her own punch connecting to his face weakly, he just landed one last punch before pulling his hand away, and she figured Johnny might actually kill her this time, reaching back behind him to where his Malorian sat, always near him and always loaded. Cold metal pressed to her temple, she screamed, unable to stop herself, scared out of her mind, only stopping when she heard another voice. 

“Johnny! Holy hell man! Get offa her! You gonna go to fuckin’ jail for poppin’ some groupie!? That what you want!?” 

Last thing she saw before he pistol whipped her was Kerry dragging Johnny off her, and she made a mental note to thank Kerry the next time she saw him. If she saw him again. Eyes closed, she wasn’t fully out, just lying there limp on the floor, feeling like she was below water. Above her, Kerry kept yelling at Johnny, and Johnny kept yelling back, rehashing the whole five minute affair, repeating to Kerry that V had his tags and wanted to get to Alt.

Their set was fast approaching, so the best thing to do, according to Kerry, was to dump her outside the club and hope to hell she didn’t press charges. Body thrown in the back alley, she heard Johnny reel back to spit on her, the glob landing right over her eye. Because throwing her body into the open air of Night City wasn’t insulting enough. 

Pain finally setting in full force, V had to will herself to sit up and act conscious enough not to get picked up by Scavs she was certain were still around more than sixty years in the past. If she let it get the best of her, she really would be knocked out cold. Getting out of the alley was what she needed to do first, picking herself up off the ground and trudging her way to the curb outside of the club. Sitting there, she just tried to think of anything but her fucked up face and ego. 

What a damn stupid idea it was to try and talk to Johnny in this world. Of course he wouldn’t be her Johnny. How damn fucked up was she? Simulation or not, she was the only one who ever got transported into his past, just now she had her own body - a body that meant nothing to him. Feeling around, she wasn’t even surprised to find that the tags were missing, taken from her when she was thrown out like trash yet again. God she messed up big time, and now she had to figure out how to leave this version of Johnny’s life all on her own. 

At least she got to listen to the muffled sounds of a Kerry Eurodyne show, the guy performing his heart out. It was funny to think that he was ever the opening act for anything, such a huge name in her time. But, everyone had to start somewhere, and his starting point was playing second fiddle to the megalomaniac that was Johnny Silverhand. 

Fuck she missed her Johnny. 

Missed the fact that right about now he’d be smoking next to her, telling her each way she fucked up and each way they could try and fix it. Instead, her only companion was a weight in her chest and her bloody face. Music was nice, though, taking her mind off the pain. Set change happening, she wasn’t surprised there were some people leaving the venue, Kerry already having a dedicated fanbase. Person after person left in taxis, gushing about how talented the guy was. That made her smile, short lived and cut off by a sharp hiss, skin torn and still bleeding. 

Eventually, the flow of people stopped, Johnny’s angry screaming coming in louder than Kerry’s melodic voice. She wasn’t even sure why she was still sitting out here, knowing well that it would serve her no good, but she also didn’t know where to go. This wasn’t her time, and she sure as hell wasn’t in a place she could easily navigate. Couldn’t rent a room at a hotel to stay in - her eddies no good here. Her holo couldn’t connect to any network here, too advanced for the primitive tech of this time. Fuck, she didn’t even know a proper hole to crawl into for the night. At least she still had the cigarette from the guy, a lighter still left in her front pocket. Lighting it, she just continued to sit and smoke until she could smoke it no more.

“Need another?” Recognizing that voice, V just shrugged, not really needing to look at who she considered a friend. He had a kind soul deep down, even for someone his best choom was just tearing into.

“Nah, I’m alright Ker - you know I don’t really smoke that much.” Shit, not her Kerry. “Sorry, Kerry, that was weird. And don’t worry. Won’t press charges on Johnny. He’s a fuckin’ asshole, but I’m,” she cleared her throat, not wanting to give too much away, “Shoulda known not to poke a bear snortin’ somethin’.” Should have gone with her gut when he seemed off the first time. 

He sat down beside her on that curb, smoking something wrapped in paper. Weed? Likely weed. “Eh, probably. But he did a real number on you, and fuck if I know how hard that man can hit. Watched him take down a fuckin’ roided up body builder. Surprised you’re even up and walkin’. Checked the alley first, thinkin’ you’d be back there. Thought you got carted off.” 

V snorted, hiding her smirk with her hand. “I can hold my own.” Not like she hadn’t tangled with Johnny before anyway. “‘Sides, I’m not your problem. Don’t gotta worry ‘bout me. Like I said, I ain’t gonna mess with him.”

“Sure, sure. Alright,” he rose from the curb, and V turned her head to look at him, his troubled face staring down at her. “You, uh...you from around here?” 

“Sorta. Long story.”

“And you know Johnny?”

“Could say I know a version of Johnny, yeah.” 

He started tapping his thigh, still looking at her like he was debating something. “How do ya know him?”

“‘Nother long story. Not like it would make too much sense anyway. Just to help put some pieces together, could say Alt introduced us as a reeeally simple explanation.” Partly true, given that if Alt hadn’t made Soulkiller they wouldn’t have been placed together in the first place. And she was here in some attempt to contact the woman. 

“Fuuuuuuck, okay. Might get me killed, but," rubbing his face, he handed V a keycard. “Hotel across the street, room 545. Stay there tonight. Supposed to be my room, but I’ll just sleep in Johnny’s. Know I’m gonna end up in there anyway, beggin’ him not to run off with some broad since Alt’ll find out.”

Inspecting the keycard, V tried her best to look confused, her battered face making that a little hard. “Why? You don’t know me…”

“You’re right - I don’t. Never fuckin’ seen you in my life. And, for the record, I think you’re outta your damn mind worse than Johnny. But,” he pulled out another blunt, lighting it, “have this weird feelin’ like I owe you somethin’. Like you and I know each other real well, even though I haven’t seen your face before.”

“You bein’ serious?” His nod in confirmation of that made hope bloom in her chest. If Kerry knew her deep down, then maybe Johnny did too. These weren’t the versions of the people she knew, but at least something here still connected them all. A red string that tied them all. 

“Thanks, choom. I owe you one. Promise, I’ll pay you back.”

“Don’t worry ‘bout it. Just clean up your face so you don’t scare people. Kinda hard to look at.” Walking back into the venue, V just smiled, happy that she had a safe place to sleep for the night. The place across the street was pretty nice, and she expected it to be pretty expensive to boot. Better not stain the towels. 

Room 545 unlocked, she stepped inside, going into the bathroom and began working on washing her face, Johnny really having fucked it up. But the mirror gave her confirmation that she looked like her, not any other version. The worst was the right side under and around her eye, likely going to take the longest to heal, a piece of skin torn right open. Nothing to patch it with, she had to suck it up and use one of the towels, leaving it there to hopefully act as makeshift gauze until she could get her hands on something better. She hoped to hell that her body in the real version of Night City didn’t look this bad, giving Judy a heart attack. Shit, if Johnny wasn’t here with her, he was likely out there as well, helpless as he watched her struggle. 

Sleep would do her some good. She only had the room for the night, and dammit she was going to use it to its fullest. Lying down, she closed her eyes, hoping for a full night’s sleep before she returned the keycard and was ejected back out into Night City.

On a list of unlucky things, V might be above walking under ladders and black cats. Rude awakening if she ever got one, someone slapped her across the face, cold metal back on her temple. “Wake up. We have some questions for you.”

Groaning, V knew that voice. Bastard called in Rogue.


	2. Meds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _I was alone, staring over the ledge  
>  Trying my best not to forget  
> All manner of joy  
> All manner of glee  
> And our one heroic pledge  
> How it mattered to us  
> How it mattered to me  
> And the consequences  
> I was confused by the birds and the bees  
> Forgetting if I meant it_

All bathrooms had a wicked vibe to them if someone stayed inside one for too long, but this one was particularly nasty. Maybe it was the yellow lighting mixing with the snorted synthcoke, but Johnny felt paranoid and sick. Washing his metal hand, that joytoy’s blood going down the drain, all he could picture was her battered face, the scream she let out when he put his gun to her head, and how damn fucking convinced she was that they knew each other. Said her name was “V,” and Johnny fucking swore he heard that before. It’s a goddamn letter, so of course he had, but there was something nagging him. Cleaning out the joints in the hand, more of her skin that was peeled off her face dislodged, and he wanted to hurl, gagging at the sight of it. He was no stranger to gore, but something about it being her flesh made him ill.

But whoever she was, she had his tags. Knew about the Pistis Sophia. Talked about Alt, and right now that would set him off no matter who it was. There was no fucking way she wasn’t some agent sent after him. No fucking way. Could be Arasaka, could be the military, could be some other entity he wasn’t aware of yet. But she knew too damn much about things he kept secret. He had time before his set, Kerry not even on stage yet, so something could be done in the meantime.

Hands dried, he fished out his holo, hitting Rogue’s contact, waiting for her to chew him out before he started making requests. He knew that she would know that he needed something from her, but he didn’t really care. Not right now. Not when that bitch was still on his mind, wearing his damn tags around her belt loop. Rogue had to get to the bottom of this for him – couldn’t trust anyone else to.

“Know you’re not calling me for some friendly fuckin’ chat. What? Alt not available to deal with your shit? Need your dick sucked so you can perform better? Fuck you, Johnny. You’re the absolute worst of the worst.”

Gripping the sink, he tried so hard not to raise his voice at her. Needed her help, and it wasn’t like they were the best of chooms. Guess what’s what happens when he cheated on her with well more than the three women she caught him with. “Nice to talk to you too, Rogue. Shit, and here I was, gonna butter you up first, but I see you just wanna be a bitch and get down to biz. Look, somethin’ weird happened and I need help.”

“Of course you do!” She was irate, and who could blame her? Johnny was the one thing she could never shake, always popping in to ruin her life. “What could be oh so important that you’ll call me up like everything is a fuckin’ Sunday picnic?”

“You’re gonna laugh at me, but I’m bein’ serious, so just fuckin’ listen.” As best he could, he told Rogue all that happened in that short time span, leaving nothing out. Even if he would have preferred she not know about the Pistis Sophia, the tags, the bitch talking about Alt. But, those were the parts that made it more than just some crazed stalker groupie. No stalker would know about those things. No one but some agent could know about those things. At the very least, the paranoia was better than if she was telling the truth.

The line went silent, but Johnny wasn’t worried. It meant she was thinking, planning, and trying to formulate how they would even tackle this issue. “I find it strange that any organization would send someone after you specifically. And so what if she knows Alt? You really think people don’t know about the most talented Netrunner of our time, even if she is glued to the tip of your dick? Which makes her even more well known. Hate to break it to you, Johnny, but you’re not that important. You’re not a thorn in anyone’s side unless they know you personally. But, whatever. Better fuckin’ pay me for this. Where is she?”

“Ker and I dumped her ass behind the venue. Should still be there. Gotta play in a few, so I’ll leave you to it.” Hanging up, Johnny looked back in the mirror, going over the events again. Rubbing his face, he tried so hard to think clearly, figure out what the fuck she was on about. He lives inside her head? Closest to her by a long shot? He promised his precious life for some gutter trash? Gave her the tags as proof of that?

Holding them up, he inspected them. Memory not the same as it used to be, he tried so damn hard to remember what those tags looked like as soon as he put them in the vent. He knew the name on the tags matched, but she could have gone in there and made a copy, right? But that still meant she knew where to look. Knew who he was before he even changed his name and formed the band. Knew about his time in Mexico, and an important detail of what happened there. No one but him knew about those things.

Mind never staying where he wanted it to, he thought about the possibility of all of this being true. That somewhere along the line he did take some dirtgirl to that hotel after she seized out. That something was life or death, and he was going to give up his life for her. That she was so close to him that any of that would even be possible.

Would she take a bullet for him?

What would her answer be?

His gut told him she’d say ‘yes.’

And that feeling there made him punch that mirror, metal hand breaking it easier than his flesh one would have. If that bitch would take a bullet for him, then she would make fucking good on that promise. Whoever V was would no longer exist by the morning.

Pre-concert ritual commencing, he got fucked out of his mind on whatever was on hand, dulling the pain and making the rage come through in waves, hoping to hell it would carry him through his performance, doing his best when he didn’t feel anything else. Part of him wished he took Rogue up on her initial offer for a blowjob before going on stage, but something about that felt wrong. And it shouldn’t feel wrong for the reason his mind gave.

Drugs in his system, a hand through his hair, a knock on the door telling him he had five minutes, and he could not get V’s face out of his head. Amplified and muted all at once, flashing between what he saw when she entered the room, his fist connecting with the flesh tearing it in places, dumping her in that alley. Finally, the nausea took him and he leaned over, puking in front of him on the carpet. Normally, the sick bile would make him feel better, purging his vile stomach contents, but nothing. Nothing felt better.

She had to go.

Checking his holo before he left the room, there was no update from Rogue, and he didn’t like that. She should have still been in that alleyway. Should still be out cold. And Rogue should be able to nab her and bring her somewhere, letting him know everything was on track. Fuck he was feeling it now. If Rogue was silent, things weren’t going the way he wanted, whoever she worked for likely grabbing her first. He should have locked her in this room or killed her himself.

But he couldn’t pull the trigger.

Walking out, he jumped on stage, screaming his heart out, no political rant, just pure music and paralyzing obsession over this whole V business. Encore refused, storming off stage, doors to the back thrown open, he checked the alley, and there was no sign of her. Like she never even existed. No blood. Nothing. He had to find her. She had to be out there.

Calling Rogue, he began to panic, pacing around the entire building, strides as wide as he could make them. “Rogue, where the fuck is she? Did you get her? Was she --”

“Calm it down – the fuck are you on?” He didn’t answer that and he just heard her sigh, the one she always let out when she was disappointed in him. “We got her. Not gonna believe this. Kerry gave her the fuckin’ key to his hotel room.”

“You better be askin’ what the fuck that gonk’s on! Who lets a crazy bitch into their room?” Relief. He felt relief, and he didn’t know why. Probably because it meant that they could finally get some answers. Zero her once she gave up as much as she was willing to. All that was.

“You two can fight about that later. Point is, she’s in Kerry’s room and I have her secured. You comin’ or am I doing all the dirty work here?” She didn’t even need to finish her statement for him to book it across the street to the hotel. Giving her a curt reply that he was on his way, Johnny punched the elevator buttons, somehow thinking that if he almost broke the mechanism that it would go faster. 7. 6. 5. Johnny pulled out a cigarette. 4. 3. It was lit, between his lips, but he was shaking so bad it was hard to suck in the smoke. 2. 1. Ding, the doors opened, and he was pushing past the people inside to get in. Another punch to the buttons, and he was puffing the cigarette as best he could, watching the numbers tick by.

Throwing the cigarette onto the carpet of the hotel hallway, he stomped his way to Kerry’s room, some animal print wearing bastard posted outside the door. “You’re definitely Johnny. Go in.” Not like he needed this scop’s permission, but Johnny guessed he was part of Rogue’s new assembled crew.

Busting into the room, his eyes landed on V first, tied to a shitty desk chair, mangled face glaring daggers his way as he entered. The desire to puke was strong once again, and he was so fucking pissed off. Too many conflicting emotions inside him, and the only remedy was to replace them all. Lips curled into a snarl, wide strides getting him to V in an instant, he punched her again, only one landing as Rogue held his arm.

“Back off Johnny! Beat her when we’re done! Fuck, I don’t care what you do with her once I get my answers, but you’re gonna wait until I do. Not havin’ you skip out on a payment because you’re the one who botched the job and I got nothin’!” Punching his organic hand into his metal one, he began pacing the room, stepping over strewn about furniture, onto and off the bed, kicking a knocked over chair, anything, waiting for Rogue to start questioning her.

“Now that rockerboy’s here, mind tellin’ me again how you know about the tags? And how do you know Alt?” Collected as ever, Rogue truly was made of stone. Medusa reincarnated with a set of eyes that knew more than the Sphinx.

“Fuckin’ told him and it landed me here, gettin’ tied to a chair, you actin’ like I’m a damn criminal. Even if I told you what I told him – and I’m sure he told you all that shit anyway – you’re not gonna believe me.” The venom in V’s voice made Johnny stop for a minute, turning toward her and looking into her eyes. Fire. That’s all he saw. The desire to burn everything to the ground to get what she wanted.

“Try me. I’m a lot more intelligent than him, and I’m a lot more reasonable too.”

“Ha!” V’s laugh was chilled, but damn it made Johnny feel something sharp near his heart. Something he hated. Enraged again, he walked over to the chair, kicking it over and then picking her back up with enough force to throw her around.

“She asked you a fuckin’ question! Answer it!”

“Johnny!” Rogue pushed him away, just rolling her eyes. “Gonna act like an asshole the whole time and I’ll make you stand outside with Santiago. Got it? Keeping you here is a courtesy!” He just snorted, trying again to smoke this time, finding it easier now that he knew V was seated there.

“Now spill. How did you find out about the tags and Alt?” Her head rolled forward, chin to her chest, and when Johnny went behind the chair he could see her rubbing her fingers against the base of her palm. She was nervous.

“Long story. In for a whole night’s worth of shit that you’re not gonna believe?”

“Highlight reel. All I need.”

V sighed, fingers still rubbing her palm, face still down. “Not gonna go into specifics, but Johnny dies, gets Soulkiller used on him, gets his engram uploaded into an Arasaka database, then gets uploaded to a prototype chip called a Relic, I go on a heist to get said chip, it’s slotted in my skull, and now he lives in my head. Followin’ so far?” Utter bullshit. He’s not dead. He won’t die at the hands of Arasaka, getting fucking Soulkiller, an urban legend, used on him. A bluff to get him and Rogue to back off.

“All I fuckin’ hear is you’re ‘Saka scum, wrapped up in some kinda messed up lie! Rip the fuckin’ chip out Rogue, see if it’s legit!” Johnny kept his distance, not wanting to be near her. Didn’t like what that did to him.

“No! Please! Don’t remove --”

“Fuckin’ shut it, princess!”

“You sure that’s a good idea, Johnny? Could fry her if we remove it.” Rogue walked over to her still, gripping V’s head and looking around for where it would be placed. “Kid, you have some serious cyberware here. Where’d you get it?”

The girl was shaking, trying to get away from Rogue’s grasp to no avail. “Explain in a minute, just do not remove that chip!”

“Rip it outta her, Rogue!”

“No!”

Johnny won the argument, Rogue pressed the slot and the chip began to slide out. Nerve pain like he’s never experienced coursing through him, Johnny buckled to the floor, screaming loud enough to make Santiago burst in to see what was going on. Everything, from his skin to his eyes, fingernails and spinal fluid, burned. Like he was being torn apart from the inside. Even his mind started to slip briefly, not remembering who he was or why he was here. It wasn’t until Rogue slotted the chip back in, lodged it right in place, that the pain stopped. V puked in her own lap, shaking and stuttering worse than he was. Crawling to her, he had the urge to touch her, let her know he was there. When he did, she kicked him away, the toe of her shoe right in his eye. Before he had time to react, Rogue threw him onto the bed, pointing at him, a decisive “stay!” making him just lie back.

“Get it together, V. Finish the story.” Rogue sounded far away, but V never did. Sounded so incredibly close, and so incredibly loud.

“Eugh,” she spat in her lap, teeth gritted together, likely still in pain. Johnny knew he was. “Fuck. You.” A slap to her face from Rogue was all it took for her to lose her temper again, spitting on Rogue. Another slap, and Johnny was pissed off all over again.

“Finish the story, V! Fuck!”

“Fuck you, asshole! You told her to rip the chip out!” Rogue, fed up with this shit, gripped her hair again, pulling her head back.

“I’m not here to play games or watch you argue with a man you think is uploaded onto a chip in your fuckin’ brain! You have five minutes before I either leave you alone with this bastard or I off you myself. Start talking.” Vice grip on her hair, V just snarled, a nasty little look that Johnny recognized. Rogue must have as well, loosening her grip before stepping away to pace in front of V while she spoke.

“Relic’s killin’ me. Makin’ my brain turn to mush so that Johnny here can take over my body. ‘Cause of how the chip works, he and I are able to chat. Been a bit since the whole shit went down, and the Johnny that’s on the chip is a real fuckin’ good choom o’ mine, even if he is still a bastard. A little more than that, actually. Took me to the Pistis Sophia, like I said. Gave me the tags there. As for the rest…” Something stopped her from continuing on, and she looked from Rogue to Johnny, back to Rogue, then to Santiago. “Want me to continue? Get him outta here.”

“And why would I ever listen to your demands?” Crossing her arms over her chest, Rogue stopped pacing, looking straight through V’s soul.

“Want the truth? I’ll give it to you. Not to him. Fucker doesn’t need to hear all this.” There was still venom in her voice, but also concern. Like she was worried about him. Fingers snapped, and Johnny was led out of there by Santiago, not able to put up much of a fight. Thrown out of the room, he was left in the hall, Santiago there to guard the door once more.

“Park it, Johnny. Just let Rogue work. You trust her, don’t you?”

“Trust her, not you, dunno you, and I don’t trust that bitch.” Leaning against the wall, Johnny started beating his head against it, impatient and not wanting shit to do with this Nomad scop. “This goes on for more than ten minutes I’m bustin’ back in there.”

“Like hell you are. Whatever happened in there laid your ass out. The fuck was she on about with that ‘Relic’?” Fixing his clothes, Santiago just leaned against the wall by the door, not relaxed, but not aggressive either. 

“Choom, if I had a clue I wouldn’t be lettin’ Rogue handle this. Still think the chick is fuckin’ whacked. Gotta work for someone, so maybe whatever is on that chip sends out some weird blast when it’s removed. Gets the people in the room with some kinda cybernetic attack if she’s interrogated. Seen weirder shit.” Hands in his pockets, he didn’t find anything else to put in his mouth to ease his nerves or the lingering pain.

“I’ll give you that. Bitch is crazy. First got in there, Rogue’s got a gun to her head, and she goes buck wild. Starts tryin’ to fight us off, and it took both me and Rogue to get her into that chair. Face all busted up from your hand, and she still acts like it didn’t touch her. But with that whole chip shit, I dunno man. Rogue seemed fine – I was fine. Only you two seemed to be affected by it.”

“So you think her gonk explanation is legit?”

“Like you, I don’t know what to think. But somethin’ ain’t right. Other shit is off too. Rogue said somethin’ real weird to me when we got her in that chair. Asked me to get her some of the stash from the car that we use to patch ourselves up with if things go sour on a mission. Wanted to know what the fuck that was about, and she said the kid needed it.”

Johnny laughed, not believing that for a second. “This some kinda weird joke? Rogue, givin’ a target summa her meds?”

“No joke – I really had to haul my ass to the car and grab ‘em. Haven’t given it to her yet, but I have never seen Rogue act that nice to anyone.” That made Johnny pause, going over things in his head once more.

V. Who was she? Compelling enough to make him think about her for hours, probably days if she lived past tonight. Lured Kerry into giving her the key to his room, got Rogue to give her meds. Made him reach out to touch her when she was in pain, just wanting her to know he was there. Couldn’t even lie to himself and say that when she kicked him he wasn’t hurt by it, spirit bruised by the act. This wasn’t even counting the fact she just felt so...familiar. Like he really did live in her head, and she lived in his.

Home.

Fist connecting with the wall behind him as he slammed it back, he seethed all over once more. Who was she to invade his damn mind like that? Fuck her.

“Won’t matter. Stickin’ some iron in her mouth and pullin’ the trigger once Rogue gets the truth from her. She got those implants to help that along?”

“The MR-Eyes? Yeah, installed two days ago. Should know if this chick is pullin’ our legs or not.”

Door coming open, Johnny tried to peek inside, catch a glimpse of V, but he couldn’t. All he saw was Rogue stepping his way. Nails digging into his skin as she grabbed the sleeve of his tank to pull him with her, she led Johnny down the hall near the elevators, jamming them while they spoke to keep things private. “What you’re going to do right now is go to your hotel room. You’re going to stay there, and you’re not leaving until the morning when you check out. Am I clear?”

“Who are you? My fuckin’ mom? I’m not doin’ dick ‘cept what I wanna do. And what I want --”

“Is answers. I know. Sadly, you’re gonna have to wait for them. V’s not lying, Johnny. She’s been telling the truth about everything so far, but I need to figure things out. But to do that I need to know you’re not gonna go ballistic and kill her.”

“You know what, go fuck yourself Rogue. You wanna keep that bitch alive, you go ahead. But I’m not stayin’ in my hotel room – I’m leavin’. Got somewhere to be.”

“And where’s that? Between the legs of some bitch in heat? You know, I shouldn’t care about Alt, seeing as she was one of the chicks you were bangin’ while with me, but I guess I know how that feels. And you owe me for dragging me into some shit I’m sure about the depths of. So you’re gonna park it, stay put, or so help me I will fuckin’ end you myself!” 

Dramatics on full display, Johnny turned tail and strutted down the hall, Rogue yelling after him. No one was going to tell him what to do, especially when he wasn’t kidding about needing to go somewhere. Shit was too much, and if Rogue wasn’t going to answer his questions, he’d go looking for the answers himself. Santiago brushed aside, he opened the door to the stairwell, running down the five flights of stairs.

The Pistis Sophia. The tags. He had the ones from V still on his person. The ones he left there after the war – they had to be there. Behind the wheel of his Porsche, he booked it to Pacifica. Find answers. He needed answers.

Window busted through, he jumped over the shattered glass. Vent removed he fished around. The tags in his hand, he held beside the ones from V. The light dim, well past midnight, but it was still enough to see it clearly.

Those were the same tags.

She had his tags.

He had his tags.

What the fuck was going on?


	3. Shake Me Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _I'll keep my eyes fixed on the sun  
>  Turn back now it's time for me to let go  
> Way down had to find a place to lay low  
> Lampshade turned around into a light post_

Head still reeling from the chip being ripped from her, vomit on her shorts, face fucked up from Johnny’s beating, and the best Rogue could do was offer her subpar meds to help? She was the Queen of the –

Right. Not her Rogue. Not her time. Not her world.

And because it wasn’t her time she forgot the meds they used back in the day left the person disoriented for some period of time. Still in Kerry’s hotel room, Rogue was waiting for her to recover enough so that she could be moved. At least she had her hands free and she wasn’t treated like a damn hostage anymore.

“I know you’re not lying to me, but somethin’ still seems off. And no, it’s not the fact that somehow Johnny dies, or that Alt is kidnapped, smart enough to use Soulkiller on herself before all hell breaks loose. Shit, it’s not even your theory that this is some simulation made up by the chip in your head. Somehow that all makes sense to me.” Hand run through her mullet, messing it up before she fixed it, that hand snapped out ot the side as she yelled at V. No anger in it, just explosive confusion. “You really mean to tell me that Johnny fuckin’ Silverhand, rockerboy hard ass, is someone you can depend on!? Went to him first to help you out!? Somehow, I just don’t buy that!”

“Explained it. The Johnny in my head had a huge fuckin’ awakening. Turned into someone I can trust.” Out of everything, V did suppose that would be the weirder bit. Johnny somehow bombing Arasaka Tower, Alt being kidnapped by said corp to develop them a version of Soulkiller – that held up. Plus, from what she could tell, she knew damn well about Johnny’s constant infidelity. 

“Yeah, ‘cause you keep him on a short leash. Whole plan is to get you both back in functioning bodies from what you said. Why you’re even in this mess to begin with. How do you know he’s not gonna run off first chance he gets? All he knows how to do is fuck with people – get them to do his bidding. You think you’re that special?”

Watching Rogue pace made her dizzy. Looking back at her puke stained shorts, better than adding to the stains, she shrugged. “Loopy, so it’s hard to explain. But I just know he’s different. The Johnny of 2077, one that’s slotted in my head, cares for me. Isn’t some wild, murderous asshole itchin’ for a fix. Was when we first met, but...that anger’s gone. Still rants about Arasaka and makes asshole remarks...Sometimes he sings to me, ya know? When I’m havin’ bad days. And they’re not even Samurai songs. How you know it’s sincere.” Seeing him back in his spiral, how chaotic and unhinged he was, how utterly destructive, hurt her very soul. But she was not going to cry about it in front of Rogue. “Why do ya even care, anyway? Dunno me.”

“Why wouldn’t I care about you, kid? You’re the best damn --” Stopping herself, Rogue narrowed her eyes, then looked at V. “You’re a merc, aren’t you?”

“Yup.”

“You didn’t tell me that.”

“Nope.”

“Fuck.”

Coughing into her hand, she was displeased to see even in this world she was still coughing up blood randomly. Meaning that she could have a Relic malfunction at any moment with no one to come and catch her. Getting worse and worse as the days went on, and now the one person she depended on to help was gone. Off god knows where with a chip on his shoulder. Wiping the blood off on her already ruined shorts, V finally tried standing, gaining her balance quickly.

“Gotta ask – when you look at me, am I a stranger? Like, you don’t recognize me?”

Up and down her body, those cold eyes looked at her, and softened. Gave her the same look that she gives her now that she knows Johnny is in her head. “Yes and no. Couldn’t pull up a damn fact about you without being prompted. Don’t know your face, didn’t know your name – nothing. But then we talk. And the more we talk the more I feel like I know you. Then it’s lost the next moment when you shut your trap.” She closed her eyes, arms crossed, foot tapping. “When I think hard about it, I can picture you sitting on some couch in a club that reminds me of the Atlantis. Dunno the place, but you’re there and I’m there. And I’m thinkin’ you’re the balliest bitch I’ve ever met.” Eyes open, she looked at V again with that piercing gaze. “And now it’s gone. Just like that. Only reason I even believe the shit you’re telling me. No other way to truly explain it.”

Weaved together from memories, hers, Johnny’s, maybe more datapoints that the Net has access to – things she could never try to understand – all building this world she’s trapped in. And likely would stay in until something happened. Brought out of this place by Alt or through some other means she’s yet to think of. Hopefully Judy wouldn’t unplug her if too much time passed, unsure of what that would do. Arms hugging herself, V kept thinking, planning, trying to figure out how to both get out of here and stay out of Johnny’s way.

What Rogue said meant that he had flashes of who she was and what they have. Somewhere in the base of his brain was their entire time together, and he admitted back when they were sitting there in her apartment after finding his grave that had trouble processing it. Coming to grips with how all consuming his love for her is. Heart to heart about a second chance, and he told her everything. Returned by her, of course, but god she knew how hard it was then for him to talk. But now? When he could barely function? There was no way he could handle it properly.

“Earth to V. You with us?”

“Yeah, sorry. Just thinkin’ about the simulation and how it’s built. Don’t have anythin’ solid, only that I need to avoid Johnny. Keep my distance ‘til I figure this out.”

“Yeah, no shit. Least your face is looking better.” Sighing, Rogue kept tapping her foot, arms still crossed. “Alright – only person I know who can likely help is the best Netrunner in Night City. Gotta contact Alt.”

“Can’t argue with that, but I have some reservations. First, prolly gonna run into Johnny if we’re tanglin’ with Alt. They’re still together – not doin’ great, but together.” And she didn’t want Alt to figure out the nature of her and Johnny’s relationship. Not her place to speed the collapse. 

“Ha!” Rogue snorted, but when she looked back at V her face softened. “Really don’t gotta worry about that. I’ll have Alt come to my place, and if we gotta head over to hers, we’ll just do it when the sun’s down. No Johnny to be found after dark. Just come on, let’s bail.”

“Okay...sure...Feel bad we’re leavin’ the room trashed, though. Vom’s all over the carpet...Kerry’s gonna be pissed he has to pay for it...” Twirling some of her hair around her finger, V looked around the room, realizing how much her fight with Rogue and Santiago damaged the place.

“And it’s on your clothes. As for Kerry, I’ll pay him back. Always liked him. Take a cab to my place, I don’t need that shit in my car. Flick you the address.”

“Can’t. My holo doesn’t work in this time.” Rogue muttered a curt “fuck” before stepping out into the hall, talking with Santiago. While she was alone in the room, V had more time to think. It was strange not getting feedback from Johnny, his input almost needed now, as she always deferred to him to talk things out. His advice was rarely usable, but it got her thinking. Now things were so oddly silent. She couldn’t ask him if he thought that there was a time pause, like when she relived his memories, or if because it was formed from them both that things would be different. If what she did here would affect the people outside of the simulation or not. If this Alt would help them. Beginning to pace, V tried to think of some smartass remark he would make, or a snarky comment, hell he might even offer her comfort, still nauseous and in pain.

Fuck, she knew she needed to avoid him, but her first instinct now, as it had been when she first realized something was up, was to go and seek him out. Bad idea. And one that would likely put her at odds with Rogue, the one person willing to stick her neck out and help her. Give her a place to stay so she could really relax and plan.

“Shit, you are some weird ass chick. C’mon, V. Let’s get you to Rogue’s.” Santiago’s voice brought her out of her trance, Nomad man before her just like she saw in Johnny’s memories. “Gonna take you in our car, but you’re sittin’ on some towels. Think you’ll hurl in the back?”

“Nah, pretty good at holding it in right now. Used to it...”

Shrugging, he waved her on, bringing her out of the hotel and to their car, lining it with towels. Climbing in, V just rode in silence, not paying attention to what Rogue and Santiago were talking about, not really caring. She just had that horrible emptiness in her, something so important to her missing now that Johnny wasn’t in her head. Magnetic pull to find him where he was and try again, against all her better judgment.

Rogue’s apartment was a small two bedroom place, loud neighbors on either side – a Night City staple. Instructed to strip her clothes and shower, she was given something else to wear, thankful for the chance to do so. Guest room all for her, V flopped onto the bed, strumming her fingers against the mattress in idle thought.

Every other thought came back to Johnny, and damn she wished he was here to help her out.

“You always this spaced out, kid?” Rogue was in the doorway, leaned against it with one foot on the frame, the other on the ground. “Gotta stop callin’ you ‘kid.’ Prolly older than I am.”

“In this time I am, actually. But, you always called me ‘kid,’ and I need a little reminder of home, I guess.” Coming to sit on the bed, Rogue just looked at her, almost sad.

“Alt’s in the living room. Stopped in before you got done with the shower. Wanna talk in here or out there?” Body exhausted and sore, she didn’t want to get up, but she also figured that having the Alt Cunningham talk to her like this was a bad move. Didn’t know her personally, but she had some respect for the woman, second hand from Johnny.

“I can try and take it out there. Shit with the biochip always takes it outta me for a while. But I think I got it.” A little help from Rogue, and V was up, walking on her own two feet as she made it back to the living room. Ugly, older couch back against the wall, and there was Alt seated on it, out of place in this dingy apartment. Raising her hand, she waved, Alt just giving her a curious glance.

“Let’s just cut the bullshit. Rogue explained most things to me – Soulkiller, the 2013 Arasaka Tower raid, my death, Johnny’s engram. How it all relates to you, how it all relates to Rogue, how it relates to Johnny, and more importantly myself.” Standing there, watching her, V wasn’t surprised Alt treated her as she did most strangers. Straightforward, cold, and analytical. “What she wasn’t clear on is why you need me.”

Living room with little furniture, V grabbed a chair from a two person dining room table, dragging it near the couch to sit. Bouncing her leg, V tried to pick her words carefully, hoping Alt would at least offer some help. “Figure that’s obvious...”

“It’s not, actually. Rogue has access to other Netrunners, other people that can help, and would certainly be more willing to. But she insisted that you needed me. Why?” There wasn’t much emotion in her face, but V knew Alt. Knew her well, and knew this was some sort of test.

“Well it was her fuckin’ suggestion. I’m just goin’ along. And it’s not hard to – know you’re the best. Dunno if she explained it, but I’m thinkin’ this is some simulation. The Net in 2077 is completely different than the Net now. Rogue AI’s scattered around the place, yours included, and it’s bein’ used to host all sorts of shit. Simulations are hard to break, so I want --”

“No, no. Stop there. I know all that.” The blonde woman looked at Rogue, who was back pacing the place. “And I agree – this sounds like a simulation of sorts. Enhanced by a chip in your head, building off of Johnny’s experiences mixing with yours. But why am I the important player here? Rogue made mention that you needed to get in contact with my AI – draw her out. Why not ask Johnny if he’s so attached to you?” Her arms were crossed, sizing her up.

“Can’t talk to this Johnny – he ain’t the one in my head. Still the Johnny from 2013, not the one killed in 2023, and certainly not my Johnny. Gotta get AI Alt to talk to someone, and I don’t think she and I are the best of chooms, so. Likely she’ll come out for…herself.” Leg bouncing more, V really hated being eyed down by both Rogue and Alt. 

Picking up a glass of water that was in front of her, Alt sipped it, nodding, lost look in her eyes as she thought. “You and that Johnny – how close are you two?”

“Pretty damn close. Hard to explain, but the way the Relic is puttin’ us together...Feel like he’s a part of me...” She hoped Alt would leave it there, not question her any further. Even Rogue stopped pacing to listen, standing right behind V and grabbing Alt’s attention for a moment.

“So by helping you I’ll be helping Johnny, in a way?” V confirmed this, explaining the plan to get Johnny his body back based off of some tips they found, utilizing Alt’s AI to help search for more solid leads on that front. “He really that different of a person, where someone is willing to go to those lengths to save him?”

“Kinda hard to see it, given this Johnny is a fuckin’ asshole – chaos incarnate who never gives a damn about anyone or anythin’ that isn’t his music or his politics – but he is. Wanted to change...So he did.”

“So you’re fucking him.”

Shit. “Pfft, wha--”

“No, that’s all I need to hear. Johnny doesn’t change because he has it in his heart. He changes because he wants something, and clearly it’s you.” Slender finger pointed out, it directed V to look at her forearm, V jumping and slapping her hand over the tattoo there. “I’ll help, but only because it’s not morally right to leave you high and dry. However, if AI Alt tells me otherwise, I’m out. You can find your own help.” Tension in the room thick, Alt got up, leaving without saying goodbye. The two women left to sit there for a while, before Rogue broke the silence. 

“Well that bit of information puts some pieces together. Figured you were smarter than that. But, I suppose we all have our weaknesses.” Even if Rogue was condescending about it, V knew she couldn’t actually judge her. Not like Rogue didn’t raid Arasaka Tower twice for that guy – probably three times if it was asked of her. “But a tattoo? That’s –” 

“Long story, don’t make me tell it. I’m fuckin’ tired, and I’m really not too pleased about you two knowin’ that bit about what Johnny and I have. Even my Rogue doesn’t know.” Thumb tracing over the tattoo, she should have realized that her forearms are exposed. How Rogue even missed it the first time is beyond her, but then again 2077 Rogue never noticed it either. 

“That ashamed to let people know you’re with him?” 

“It’s not shame…” Her arm read ‘Johnny + V’ and there was no shame in that. “Of the people that know Johnny’s in my head...you, Kerry, my friends, they’re not too pleased about the situation as a whole. Watchin’ Johnny kill me slowly ain’t exactly fun. Don’t wanna rub salt in a wound that’s fresh. But’s let’s just drop it…”

“For now.” 

V decided she was too tired to keep staying out in the living. Slow walk back to the guest room, she lied down in that bed again, Rogue sitting on the edge of the bed, helping V adjust. “Makes me feel like we have somethin’ goin’ at least. Alt believes me and is gonna work on a plan. Thanks for that. Musta been rough, so...”

“Yeah, sure.” Patting her hip, Rogue got up. “Goin’ out. Have jobs to do – you know the drill. Can’t call me, but I have a neighbor in 4D that will help if you ask. Old bat can’t turn down a pretty face with puppy dog eyes.”

“Thanks again...” Short with her, but V didn’t care much. Despite it all, she wished for Johnny to stand beside her and crack jokes or compliment or demean her on how she handled Alt. She felt so damn empty, yearning, longing, and fuck she could use a cigarette and a shot. Cold laugh, that was a very Johnny type thought, and she was concerned by how well he could hear his voice calling to her, telling her he’s nothing like that anymore. She wished that was the damn case for this Johnny.

Not her world, not her time, not her Johnny. Reminder that this was her problem to solve now. She had resolve, always did, and fuck she was going to use it now. After a nap...She needed a nap.

Rude awakening, a constant in Night City of any time, there was a banging on the door. His voice so clear in her ears, she jumped up to open it before she remembered. Not her Johnny. And this Johnny wanted her dead. Hard to wrap her head around, but it was a fact she had to get used to. Locking the door as quick as she could, he didn’t get in.

“V...Fuck! Open up! Open the fuckin’ door!”

“Leave, you dick! Leave or I’m callin’ the cops!” She couldn’t, but he didn’t know that.

He was shaking the door by the handle, trying to force it open, kicking it when he couldn’t. Banging on it again, and V came to hold it closed, just so that he couldn’t rage himself into making it open. “Get out here you fuckin’ bitch! Fuck you, get out here!” Another bang, V keeping her body there to keep it shut, and she screamed when he actually forced it open. Head smacked against the wood, the world glitched, everything turning to blue lines. A malfunction. Fuck! Fuck!

Muscles seizing up, limbs coming to clench against her body, and he was above her, holding all the power.


	4. No One Loves Me & Neither Do I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _And I said, "No one loves me, neither do I"  
>  It makes perfect sense  
> So I never ask, "Why?"  
> All gone tomorrow  
> 'Cause life doesn't wait  
> You can keep your soul  
> I don't wanna cell mate_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: drug use. This chapter features Johnny using drugs, and not in a recreational way. Not super explicit, but definitely not something light. Follows canon typical depictions of the way Johnny used.

Chapter 4: No One Loves Me and Neither Do I  
______________________________________________

Pacifica might be a dump, but it’s not his dump. And spending a night at the Pistis Sophia left him in the same state it did back over ten years ago: shaking, sweating, and itching to leave. Sitting there in the turned around chair, arms draped over the back, he held the two pairs of tags in his hands, looking there at the vent he opened.

_“Get up. Pacific’s beautiful this time of day.”_

_“Almost flatlined by that attack.”_

_“Almost.”_

Teeth gnashed together, the same conversation playing over and over, and he knows for a damn fact he didn’t have it with her. Didn’t say those things to her because he doesn’t know her.

_“Would you take a bullet for me?”_

_“I would, yeah.”_

Weak. Small. She curled up after they spoke for a minute, clutching those tags. He could see it play out in his mind, over and over again. Him, so fucking terrified. Dead. He was dead, and he wanted one shot at life, and he was so afraid that V would die before he got it. Still, he nudged her on, telling her that she was better than that. Better than him. And she’d find a way to live.

_“Wanna be clear – I will do you no wrong. When the time comes, it’ll be my life for yours, I’ll agree to get wiped. Tag’s are proof of my promise.”_

_“I...I’d do the same for you.”_

Abused and used her, but she still had his tags. Held onto them for dear life, and he knew he almost broke her fingers trying to get them. Face so determined to keep them, and why? They don’t know each other. They don’t. He knows they don’t.

_“Seconds later, feels like I’m missin’ somethin’ – somethin’ really important. Then I realize you’re there, always were, and this stupid wave of relief washes over me.”_

_“Feel the same. Like I’m no longer alone – don’t have to be. That you’ll always be there, and I don’t gotta worry anymore.”_

Throat dry, muscles sore, cold sweats, and he was seeing shit. That’s all this had to be. He needed a fix. He needed to get out of here. Holo fished out of his pocket, he couldn’t call Alt to come get him, too proud to have her see him like this. Kerry. Kerry would come to him. Still mad at the bastard for letting that bitch sleep in his room, but at least it got Rogue to her. Even if that didn’t end in her death like he wanted.

“Ker, I --”

“Johnny!? Where did you go last night!? Seriously – the fuck was happenin’, man? You gonna be alright?” That lovely concern Kerry always had for him. Chasing after him like a lost puppy each time. At least he knew he’d come get him. “Rogue’s stormin’ into my room, V’s going ape shit, and I’m just tryin’ to get into your room so I can sleep! What is goin’ on?” Noises from the other line, and Johnny knew where Kerry ended up last night after he couldn’t get into the other room. Between some guy’s legs, no better than he is.

“Tell ya later. Not important right now. In Pacifica. Come get me? Everythin’ll be fine if ya do.” Putting on his saddest voice, Johnny hoped that was enough to come and pull Kerry from that bed he was in, he laid it on thick. “Jus’ need a ride...Got stranded out here.”

“I...” A pause on the line, and he heard the familiar sounds of a goodbye kiss, Kerry promising to call. He never would. “Where in Pacifica?”

“Docks...meet you by the docks.” A long walk, but Johnny knew he had time to get there, and frankly he needed the sea breeze to clear his head. Take his mind off whatever happened in the room and the shakes. He felt sick, disgusted, wronged – all at once. Eye still hurting, he rubbed over it as he descended the stairs of the hotel, just realizing he was still holding both sets of tags. Bottom of the stairs reached, he looked at them, placing them both in his pockets. The fuck was he supposed to do with these? But he wasn’t walking back up those stairs.

Journey to the docks made, he waited there, wanting so badly to throw himself into the water for a wake up call. Water too toxic for that, he’d have to settle for smelling it, the scent of it still crisp. Sound of an engine made him turn to the street, Kerry’s car pulling up. Spent his money on cars and guitars, and Johnny spent his on women and drugs. Couldn’t fault the other for their vices, he supposed, friendship built off the mutual admiration of the other and what they were strong in. Similar vices only negated by the other coming in and helping out. He’d never admit that aloud, but he thinks Kerry knows. Has to know, given he’s reaching over to open the car door for him.

“Shit, Johnny. Look like hell.” Driving off, Johnny rolled down the window to keep air on him. Anything to help.

“Fuckin’ feel it too…Take me to Heywood?” That got Kerry to groan, rolling down his own window and turning up the music. Little punk station that sometimes played their songs – and Samurai’s songs, the band long dead now. Shame. Playing with all of them made him the happiest he’d been in a long time.

“Fuckin’ Heywood? Seriously? What’re you gonna do in Heywood, man?” Johnny didn’t need to answer, mostly because Kerry knew. “Same spot?”

“Haven’t switched dealers.” A sigh, and Kerry was turning onto the ramp to Heywood, and Johnny just tried to take his mind off of everything going on. A fix. Get a fix, and he’d stop seeing her face when he closed his eyes, some hallucination his brain made up because he stupidly didn’t use before he went off to Pacifica.

“Alright – explain what the fuck happened yesterday. Who the hell is V?” This time Johnny groaned.

“Dunno. Some crazy bitch.”

Kerry began tapping his steering wheel, shifting the gears in the car to drive faster now that traffic was gone. “Uh-huh. And you just happen to sick Rogue on ‘some crazy bitch’? I don’t buy it. ‘Cause, right after, when I got a call from Rogue, she starts askin’ for Alt’s number, sayin’ my hotel room is trashed and she’d pay for it, and that V is stayin’ at her place. And that ain’t somethin’ Rogue normally does, unless I’ve somehow missed her becomin’ Mother Theresa, hell bent on makin’ amends with your current output and helpin’ the homeless. So, ‘some crazy bitch’ isn’t gonna cut it.”

Refusing to discuss V, he moved to an easier topic. “Why the fuck is Rogue askin’ for Alt’s number? And why’d she ask you of all people for it?”

“’Cause she knows I have it. Ever think that Rogue and I are sorta chooms? That Alt and I talk sometimes? Kinda gotta be in contact with each other when we’re all coordinatin’ where to scrape you up off the pavement.” Lighter pulled out, pack of cigarettes following it, and Kerry lit one for himself, using the red end of that cigarette to light one for Johnny. Passed to him, Johnny took it in his clammy, shaky hand, at least his lips cooperating enough to let him smoke.

“My exes havin’ a fuckin’ chat over some crazy bitch I tried to throw in the dumpster. Who woulda thought. My bets are on Alt killin’ Rogue with a well placed hack ‘fore the whole shit’s over.” That got them both to laugh a little, easing the tension in the car. But Kerry was never one to drop a conversation once it wormed its way into his brain, and Johnny could tell he was gearing up to say something.

“Seriously, man. You don’t know V?”

“No! Don’t know the cunt, and I wish she was dumped in a landfill to be picked off by the fuckin’ scavs.” Drag of the cigarette, wind in his hair, and he started searching Kerry’s car for anything stronger than tobacco. Finding a half smoked blunt, he lit it, taking a drag of it instead of the cigarette, pissing Kerry off to no end that he was stealing his drugs now. Passed to Kerry, smoke blown in his face as he did, he hoped the playfulness would get Kerry to finally fucking drop talking about the one thing he didn’t want to talk about.

“Thanks,” A drag, smoke blown in Johnny’s face, playful smirk, and Johnny knew if he needed he could replace the man in Kerry’s bed for the night, things with Alt turning sour based on anything Rogue said to her. “Wanna be clear – dunno V either. But there’s somethin’ weird goin’ on. No answers had last night?”

“Botherin’ you that much? Why? ‘Cause you wanted a piece of ass, and I just ruined your chance? Whatever – fuck off.” Answer’s yes, he got some, but none he wanted. And he was still a little sketched out by everything, especially that phantom connection he had towards her. The chip in her head affecting him. Weird stuff, and he wasn’t sure how to process it, let alone tell it to Kerry. “No answers – nothin’. Just a trashed room and a fight with Rogue.”

“So you weren’t fuckin’ her behind Alt’s back?”

“Wasn’t behind her back – Alt and I have been done for a long time. V’s not that kinda chick.” Defensive, but that wasn’t the truth. He was still with Alt, but he had this need to defend V’s honor. Not his – V’s. Fuck. He can just pretend Kerry didn’t hear that. “We close to Heywood?”

“Yeah...five minutes.”

“Then keep your ass quiet for five minutes. Got the shakes.” Which was true, and enough of an excuse for Kerry to leave him alone. Silent the rest of the way, when he got to his dealer’s spot he got out of Kerry car, buying his usual cocktail of uppers and downers to take at needed intervals. He knew Kerry hated this part, but he couldn’t wait to skirt off to some private room. Least he could do is do it in the backseat.

Backdoor open, climbing into the seat, he told Kerry to drive. Everything set up, he made sure Kerry wasn’t looking before he used. Done, and he instantly felt himself stop shaking. Head falling back, he let himself become comfortably numb for a while, eyes closed.

“Johnny...”

“’M here, Ker...” Words slurred, he’d need the uppers soon. But he wasn’t thinking. He was just...empty. Devoid of everything. Devoid of her. For a while.

Once more, she was there.

_“Said it was important to you.”_

_“It was. But not more important than you.”_

It didn’t leave him...Didn’t fade away. Metal arm always working better than his organic in this state, he blindly fumbled for the other baggy of stuff, finding it, bringing it to him so he could open it. Fingers not cooperating, he tried so hard. Open. Pinky dipped in, he rubbed some on his gums, knowing he couldn’t snort it yet. Maybe it’ll help...It didn’t. At least not with the visions.

Perked up, he finally moved to sit in the seat normally, looking at Kerry, stilling driving aimlessly. “Ker, take me to Rogue’s.”

“I’m not takin’ you there.”

“Do it.” Organic hand on his shoulder, Johnny knew he was weak to that, always giving in when he touched Kerry like that. “Please, Ker. Just wanna ask her for some help. Rogue’s the best at what she does and I need her for somethin’.”

Mop of black hair, unstyled and messy, fell to the back of the head rest, and Johnny could see in the portrait of Kerry’s face that he was conflicted. “Just to see Rogue? Ask her for help?”  
“Who else would I wanna see there? Know me, Ker. If I wanted to fuck over V I woulda asked for that. Mean it...Wanna see Rogue.”

“Fine...”

Kiss to his cheek, and damn if that didn’t seal the deal. Car driving to Rogue’s, the two talked music, discussing their next show – neutral topics to make sure Johnny was still aware, he’s sure. He knew the routine. How everyone treated him when he got into these moods.

Outside of Rogue’s building, Johnny got out, another cigarette from Kerry tossed on the ground and stomped. Peeking around the side of the building, Rogue’s car was gone. Good. He wanted to know some shit from V. Why did he keep seeing her face everywhere he looked? Couldn’t shake her, not one bit. He needed to know what the fuck she was on about. No need to kill her, that chip might do it for him, if she was right. And maybe that would stop all this shit. Either way, he wanted to know what her deal was straight from the horse’s mouth.

Door unlocked, Rogue never changing the code, the apartment was quiet. Living room the same as it always was, kitchen messy but the same too, and Rogue’s room clear. The guest room, though, was closed. Knocking on the door, he tried to see if V was in there. No answer. Again. Louder. No answer.

Was she alright? That chip take her out this soon?

“V...Fuck! Open up! Open the fuckin’ door!”

“Leave, you dick! Leave or I’m callin’ the cops!” Muffled, but then he heard a shuffle, the door locking from the other side.

Shaking the handle, a little too violently on accident, likely scaring her shitless. Frustrated, not even sure why he cared if he frightened her, he kicked the door. Banging again, he just wanted to talk, but the drug induced rage he always fell into was taking over. Her body was against the door now, he heard it, and that pissed him off even more.

Never realizing the words that come out of his mouth until he says them, screaming “Get out here you fuckin’ bitch! Fuck you, get out here!” and he felt like pure shit. A thud, her weight suddenly off the door, he finally got it open, and if he thought he felt like shit in Kerry’s car, at Pacifica, or even when he was washing his hand in the bathroom at the club, it didn’t compare to right now.

On the floor, seizing out, and Johnny knew for a fact he’d seen this before. V. His V. Standing over her, fear in her eyes before they glazed over, he grabbed her wrists, holding them so she didn’t begin to claw at herself. Knees hit the ground, sitting cross legged, he picked up her shaking body, knowing he’s not supposed to move her, but fuck he needed to hold her. “I got you, V. I got you…”

The noises she made, the coughing, the blood on his tank, and he just held her close. Rocked her. Pet her hair, and told her she’d be okay. He didn’t think of anything else – not the drugs, the music, the hatred. All that mattered was that she was okay. She was cold, so he reached behind them and grabbed the blanket from the bed, wrapping her in it. Seizing finally stopping, she went limp for a moment, and Johnny shifted in that small room, back against the edge of the bed, stretching his legs out to hold her against his chest better.

Shit...she seemed so small. Fragile. He wanted to puke again.

“Eugh...shit...” Sounded so hoarse...Fuck. She wasn’t doing well. Shivering, Johnny wrapped her tighter, and she curled into him, breathing in deeply, her exhaling breath against the exposed part of his skin. “Johnny...” The way she said his name broke his heart. Head falling back against the mattress, he lost himself in this moment, relinquishing himself to feelings that felt so natural. The need to keep her safe, even if she was the most dangerous person he’d ever seen.

“Right here, darlin’. I got you.” What? Darlin’? He didn’t call anyone darlin’. No one. No one but V. A woman he didn’t fucking know, but god if his brain didn’t tell him he did. Answers could wait, he needed to know V would be okay.

“Johnny!?” Rancorous shouts thrown his way, and he pulled his eyes from V to see Rogue in her own apartment, glaring at him from the doorway. “What did you do to her!? Get out! Get out now!” She picked V up from his arms, placing her on the bed before grabbing him by sleeves of his tank, pushing him out. All he could do was desperately look at V, seeing her half awake on the floor, dazed, reaching for him. Only thing he could do, he reached in his pocket, throwing the spare set of tags her way, important that she have them back. But why?

Door slammed in his face, and he was pissed all over again.

Back out of the building, arms raised up as he ran, he kicked a dent in Rogue’s car, then another. A third. He wanted to smash her windows in, but that would have been a bad idea.

V. Alone. Without him. Was she okay?

Why did he care? He didn’t know her. Wanted her dead less than twenty-four hours ago. Iron in her mouth, and he was going to pull the trigger.

She seemed so weak...Small. She wasn’t small, he knew that, but she felt it right then. Whatever that chip was, it was eating away at her brain. Making her suffer. 

He had this urge. Insatiable. Strong. He walked. Miles. He walked and he was exhausted by the time he found where he wanted to be. 

Stairs ascended two steps at a time, he knocked on the door. Alt’s face greeted him, but she didn’t look pleased to see him. Typical nowadays, but fuck he was hoping for something more than a cold stare his way. “Thought you weren’t comin’ home for the week. Not if you could help it.”

“Shit changed...Can I come in or not?” She stepped out of the doorway, letting him in, and Johnny immediately went to the fridge, pouring some of the filtered water she kept in there in an empty glass. Chugging it, he turned around to see her dip into her – their – bedroom. Glass placed in the sink, he followed her back. His normal M.O. would have been to try and butter her up, tell her things she loved to hear, all before getting her to come to bed with him. Today, however, was different.

Strong urge, feeling it in his bones, when he crossed the threshold he sat on the bed, her desk beside it. She was working, but that wasn’t unusual. She’d stay up all hours of the night doing what she was doing, just the same as he would when he was writing or playing music. “Alt...Stop for a minute?”

Huff from her, but she still turned to face him. “Johnny, what’s wrong?”

“Lotta shit happened today, alright? Jus’...look. You mind if you hold me? Just for a minute or two? Not askin’ for long – know you’re busy, but I --”

Ice cold, Alt just turned back to her work. “Don’t even pretend we’re back to me doing that. Not after you blame me for all your problems and storm out, ghost me for a few days. Shit, didn’t even try and kiss me, and now you’re asking for me to hold you? Johnny, seriously? Ya know, any other day I would, but...A lot of shit is on my mind too, and I need to get it done. I love you, but...Not after all this.”

Muscles in his legs twitching, knowing his mouth would get the better of him if he stayed in the room any longer, and he left. Brought his ass to the couch and parked it there. Hours ticked by, he tried to sleep, but that urge still bubbled in him. All he wanted was to be fucking held, listen to a heartbeat, and be reassured that shit was alright.

Listen to V’s heart. Know she was alright. And maybe Alt would have been a good substitute if she fucking entertained him. Couldn’t blame her, given he did fuck shit up between them time and time again, but they were soulmates. Alt told him that. Johnny told her that.

But he kept thinking of V.

_“Johnny, do you love me? Like...really?”_

_“Even gotta question it? Look, ain’t us bein’ shoved together that’s makin’ me love you. Could meet you any time in any place, and I’d still love you just as much as I do now. You’re that kinda person, V.”_

_“Yeah, well, you’re that kinda person too, loverboy.”_

Legs swung out, he planted them on the floor, using the momentum to hoist himself up. Fist pounding on the closed door to their room, Johnny made up some piss poor excuse for why he was leaving. No use in staying here. This place wasn’t home any longer – no longer had the same feeling as holding V in his arms did. No recollection of it, just a thousand ghosts, and all of them V.


End file.
